About a week ago, I put this picture on Instagram. The caption is simple: Choose the joy. That is what my mom always said. This picture was taken while I was laughing with a dear friend as we sat across the table from a man dying from a horrible cancer with a terrible prognosis. And…
Category: Love
Somewhere Between
Somewhere between the first anniversary of your death and the second anniversary of celebrating your birthday without you – I have moved into a better space. The astonishment of feeling guilty for not missing you is not something for which I had prepared, nor was the feeling of overwhelming nostalgia for you as I sat…
Four Your Favorite Number
Undiscovered I: The streets are blocked Just like my mind Uncomfortable and hot I search for a cool drink And all I hear are the echoes of your voice At the card table Searching for the Marfa lights In your bedroom Nature swoons to remember you The wind across the desert The butterflies and birds…
The Morning You Died
I have no idea what I was wearing. There is really no way to figure out such insignificant details. Sleepy and confused I sat by your side. You gasped and heaved for a breath. Your eyes were wide and distant. Watching your chest rise and fall, counting each breath knowing your passage was near. I…
unpublished love 5
trastevere, il primo agosto reveal to me what i left behind 19 years ago presented with choices i did my best to remain intact a battle insignificant to most gave to me courage bravery gratitude reaching into the coffers i request a large withdrawal that depletes my accounts as i beg for mercy and ask…
Family Gifts: The River and Cards
Ever since I can remember my family has combatted boredom in two ways: 1.) Go to the river 2.) Play cards My personal favorite is to play cards at the river. This does not literally have to be on the banks of the river, although when camping that’s fun too. My family has a great…
unpublished love 3
the rose petals have fallen, sunken, dropped italian frescoes crumble into piles of expensive dust where cars whizz by without a care onto ancient roads of traveled souls, where gold seeps into the aqueducts where the decadence of Rome poisons the people into believing that gratitude is not a blessing to be revered when discoveries…
unpublished love
unpublished love comes to me like a cloudy vision that sounds like distant church bells* that wake me from sleep unpublished love is why i toss and turn because it whispers my name and then vanishes unpublished love lights the night sky with the brightest stars to remind us unpublished love waits for me at…
as i learn to walk again
at a pivotal age i learned that life ends and begins around me a pet deer a dead father tadpoles in the pool kidnappers behind the swing i begged for lighting rods ant bait and code words to protect me from my own mind i have experience with the dark night and the sun will…
resilience
dirty windows look upon a cottage from my dining room i keep a careful watch over bedroom curtains then i can see flickering lights if she wrestles with the night while i am awake writing silly poems about love as each day passes it will be harder to drive away the maturation process the…
for the innocent
the full moon eclipsed by a cloudy night finds its way to my core where moments are treasured like lucky pennies to be given away in dreams where the wind blows impressions of a softness on a difficult day to remind me that Spring returns where meditations trace my beginnings to a river, diverged that…
A Plane Crash, a Needlework Sampler, and a Painting
This is a tale of ancestors, angels, and spirit guides. This tale is about the manifestation of whatever lies on the other side into physical form in my world. Connecting the events is tricky. Let me introduce my mother, Artis Ann and her Papa. Artis Ann was Papa’s only child. This photograph was taken before he…
arlisann 