Mama Always Said Choose the Joy

About a week ago, I put this picture on Instagram. The caption is simple: Choose the joy. That is what my mom always said. This picture was taken while I was laughing with a dear friend as we sat across the table from a man dying from a horrible cancer with a terrible prognosis. And…

The Morning You Died

I have no idea what I was wearing. There is really no way to figure out such insignificant details. Sleepy and confused I sat by your side. You gasped and heaved for a breath. Your eyes were wide and distant. Watching your chest rise and fall, counting each breath knowing your passage was near. I…

My Bravest Moment

Yesterday, I delivered the eulogy at my sweet mama’s memorial service. It was not nearly as hard as I had imagined and certainly won’t compare to the emptiness I will feel in the days to come. But for today, I can say that I am proud of myself that I tried to give my mother a proper good-bye. After…

resilience

  dirty windows look upon a cottage from my dining room i keep a careful watch over bedroom curtains then i can see flickering lights if she wrestles with the night while i am awake writing silly poems about love as each day passes it will be harder to drive away the maturation process the…

A Plane Crash, a Needlework Sampler, and a Painting

This is a tale of ancestors, angels, and spirit guides. This tale is  about the manifestation of whatever lies on the other side into physical form in my world. Connecting the events is tricky. Let me introduce my mother, Artis Ann and her Papa. Artis Ann was Papa’s only child. This photograph was taken before he…

For the Love of Shoes

I have said that I love shoes, as recently as this week. I always joke with my students that I like their shoes and ask if we can trade. They always say no, until I asked Derek. He said yes, and he was serious. I kicked off my shoes and he his. They were a…

Validation Comes From Within

Validation comes from within. That is a recurring theme as I have had many external reminders. I’ve been living in a beautiful paradox. There are no referees in Paradox. There are only signs – contradictory of course. These signs remind you that at every turn you MUST live in the present moment. Dream in the…